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Author Topic: best female combatives instructor?  (Read 564 times)

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best female combatives instructor?
« on: September 24, 2013, 08:02:42 PM »

i was gauging interest in my wife training a bit and asked if she would rather learn from a man or a woman. from a concept and teaching mannerism view she would prefer learning from a female. from a hands on aspect we both agreed working actual defense scenarios would better done against a male for realism. are there any top notch female systema/combatives instructors that do woman focused material?
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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #1 on: September 24, 2013, 09:36:00 PM »

The best would likely be to go to South Africa and train with Mark Human AND (perhaps more importantly) his wife Kelee Arrowsmith.

As long as your wife will practice, it's far more important to find a quality instructor than to choose the sex or any other particular attribute of the teacher EXCEPT for quality of instruction.

If you were around here I would urge her to practice with us since we take pride in working things applicable to women and anyone else not matter what their previous experience or inherent combat skill.

Women NEED to train against men since MOST of the serious danger will come from (evil) men.

Men NEED to train with women, because it reminds us that many times we ALL will be outclassed by a larger, stronger, faster, fitter, younger, more athletic, better armed, more violent attacker -- AND his friends.

We need to work out strategies and skills that will work against someone who has recently graduated from Pelican Bay Health Club, Sing Sing Fitness, or Huntville (TX) Weighlifting training.

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HerbM
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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #2 on: September 25, 2013, 06:52:42 AM »

its a given that we should all train with our most likely opponents in the most realistic situations. but i think mentally there is a disconnect between a male instructor and a female participant. no matter how hard we try as men we cant present the material to achieve the same familiarity that a woman could. men just arent used to being targeted on a regular basis as a victim in the same manner a woman is. i have heard many women say they dont take self defense classes out sheer intimidation. there is a fear factor some ladies cant get past.

for example, giving a seminar at a women's violence shelter might be best done by a woman(with men present to serve as a punching bag) simply because of comfort levels.
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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #3 on: September 25, 2013, 08:30:47 AM »

Your pretty much right, although suggesting that a woman should inherently be able to teach other women better than a man identifies you as a sexist pig. 

Just kidding.   ;)

We have discussed this before in case you missed it: http://www.combativestraininggroup.com/forum/training/women's-self-defense-classes/

The baseline issue is that most women, like most men, haven't really thought out what they want, much less what they need, from a self-defense class.  Most people go in wanting to get this...



...which is 100% pure snake oil.  If instructors give students that BS, the students are happy but woefully unprepared.  If the instructor gives them something more effective it's in conflict with most students' expectations of "easy" and causes discomfort.  Because most students don't know "more effective" is what they need, they blame this discomfort on the instructor being a male (if they are female) because, like sexist JeremyM, they have been conditioned to assume men are somehow inherently deficient in teaching women.

This makes men teaching women "more effective" self-defense a very tricky proposition.  It's possible and I think we get it done pretty well here, but it's a minefield of preconceived notions and personal emotional baggage. 

So, yes, women instructors do have an advantage in that they don't have to deal with that stuff, but if they are teaching "easy" the advantage is theirs alone vis a vis attracting female students.  Any female student who chooses a female instructor teaching "easy" over a male instructor teaching "more effective" does so to their own detriment.




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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #4 on: September 25, 2013, 09:00:05 AM »

hmmm....your right steve but its not that men are deficient in teaching. i think the gap in learning is created on the woman's end out of fear. especially, for women who have actually been assaulted by a man. i feel like i could convey material to a female just as well as i could a male but some women are just petrified of man because of psychological trauma. another factor of a woman having a slight advantage would be the mentality of the students thinking....if she can do it so can i. the actual material isnt the focus so much as the ability of women to grasp the concepts because they are somewhat empowered by another woman who exhibits strength and confidence. the equation looks a bit like this:

a strong woman as a presenter with an effective system + a few guys to be attackers in realistic scenarios = a more successful womens self defense class


oink oink
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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #5 on: September 25, 2013, 09:20:28 AM »

a strong woman as a presenter with an effective system + a few guys to be attackers in realistic scenarios = a more successful womens self defense class
Yes, I completely agree...but show me "a strong woman as a presenter with an effective system".

While we are waiting there are MANY women out there who could be getting "more effective" training from "disadvantaged" male instructors. 
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"Don't believe what anyone says about any method. Fighting takes heart, and heart comes from believing in what you do because you KNOW it works from personal experience." -Tom Sotis AMOK!

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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #6 on: September 25, 2013, 09:32:12 AM »

i would LOVE to show you one!

maybe we should start training women for the purpose of teaching then test the hypothesis that QUALIFIED female instructors would draw more women to train and have a higher retention rate of women who continue to train.



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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #7 on: September 26, 2013, 12:14:19 AM »

I disagree with the idea that women can inherently teach women better.  An outstanding teacher is just that -- most people have only ever experience mediocre teaching.

Women however seldom find that training is just plain fun.

They attend training to solve a problem or because of fear.

Once they solve the problem, get over the fear, or just get distracted they stop attending.

Men do this to, but SOME MEN, also just plain get a kick from training.

Guess who you guys all are!

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Re: best female combatives instructor?
« Reply #8 on: September 28, 2013, 05:14:09 PM »

For me I use my wife as the assistant instructor to get women through the door. The ones i usually get are either interested more in me than what I'm teaching (here is my WIFE the assistant instructor, which usually scares them off) have had something happen to them that made them realize they need training (and could care less that I'm a man), or ones that have came in with some one else (sister, friend, parent, whatever). Usually when i talk to them to convince them to join they are 'shy' or nervous, until i introduce my wife as the assistant who will be primarily working with them that day. After that they seam much more interested in participating. From there i try and use them after a while in the demonstrations to get them used to dealing with bigger guys.

There has been a good mix of men and women (non husband/wife teams) in the CHL classes though, so that's a start.

"Once they solve the problem, get over the fear, or just get distracted they stop attending."

I have noticed that as well, i get quite a few that ask self defense questions during CHL classes that are not interested in overall training, they just want that question, that scenario answered. I also had one lady argue that the 2 hour lady's self defense course she took was the be all end all (All you need is a kick to the groin, end of discussion).

Just reenforces the importance of drills that involve protecting a 3rd person (wife/GF/whatever)
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